Monday, November 21, 2011

The One and Only, You.

Single and ready to mingle? In a relationship with someone? Currently dating? In an open relationship?  Hmmm.
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What about this one...

Single and, happy being with just yourself? 

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There is nothing wrong with being alone. On the contrary, there's everything right in being alone. I think that a lot of people miss out on being just with themselves.. chillin' with just yourself.. going to the movies with just yourself... spending weekends with just yourself.. and relying just on ... you guessed it... yourself.

In order to be fully and completely happy in a relationship with someone else, you gotta be fully and completely happy in the relationship you have with yourself first. It's so easy to get distracted or preoccupied by the gifts other people bring into your life... happiness, laughter, pleasure, attention, affection, love, nurture.. these are all wonderful gifts that we are privileged to receive from other people, and we should cherish and value these things.

But what happens the moment these gifts are taken away, discontinued or just one day stop happening? I can guarantee that while unconditional love from other people does exist, it's absolutely nothing you can depend on. You can only depend on one thing... and one thing only.

Your own unconditional love.

Before you can have any successful relationship (platonic or romantic), you have to first work on and perfect the relationship you have with yourself.

It's funny though, because being with just yourself is a friggin' hard thing to do for a lot of people, including myself (but I'm working on it). It's so much easier to be around other people and feed off their energy, to receive compliments that make you feel good, to go out and have fun with friends... this is easy to do! What's hard is being with yourself in solarity and feeding off your own energy, giving yourself compliments that make you feel good, and going out and having fun by yourself. This is hard because it's scary being alone. There's no one there to distract you from things you might've been hiding from from a long, long time.

The cue that tells us we can be happy and satisfied with someone else is the moment we realize we are able to live happily, comfortably and satisfied alone. And watch, once you are able to get to the point where you are best friends with yourself, you won't yearn so much for the presence of someone else. Don't ya love the irony here, people!

Being single and ready to mingle is fun (trust!!), and relationships (platonic or romantic) are fulfilling and wonderful, but all are almost a waste of time if, at the end of the day, you're not totally secure, happy and comfortable with just...




yourself.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Angels on Earth

She raised 5 kids in a 3 bed, 1 bathroom home in San Francisco. She's gone to church every Sunday for the past, well actually, her whole life. She sings in the choir every Sunday. She keeps a kitchen that always has tons of home cooked Arabic food ready to eat. She won't be happy until you are completely, overwhelmingly stuffed with her food. She has the most beautiful smile and caring eyes. She is probably the most popular senior citizen I know, as her telephone line is always busy (she has a ton of girlfriends from church). She loves watching her soap operas, especially Days of Our Lives. She loves to dance. She won't go to sleep until she knows that each and every one of her children are safe. She is the glue that keeps my family so tight. She is charming, warm hearted and a wonderful human being.

She is my Teta.





It's so important to treasure and appreciate the people in our lives who have been there for us.. the people who love us and the people who would sacrifice anything for us. The individuals in our lives who protect, love and guide us are, in other words, our angels. This is what angels do... love, protect and guide. Many times we don't realize that we have many angels here on earth.. whether they are our parents, grandparents, friends, a co-worker, mentor, professor, neighbor or a significant other.

Teta is one of my special angels here on earth. And there's nothing, and I mean nothing, I wouldn't do for her.